The Gift

In the novel Little Women, by Louisa May Alcott, Jo finds herself caring for a dying younger sister and surrendering to some selfless unintelligible gift, the elusive gift given by the dying to those sturdy with life.

“Precious and helpful hours for Jo, for now her heart received the teaching that it needed: lessons in patience were so sweetly taught her that she could not fail to learn them; charity for all, the lovely spirit that can forgive and truly forget unkindness, the loyalty to duty that makes the hardest easy, and the sincere faith that fears nothing, but trusts undoubtingly.”

The sincere faith. That fears nothing. But trusts beyond doubt.

To be gracious enough to open our hearts that wide, to love that unconditionally in the face of suffering, dying, impossibilities... a gift, and a Mystery.

Jo faces the Mystery only to find her worldly priorities checked:

“...with eyes made clear by many tears, and a heart softened by the tenderest sorrow, she recognized the beauty of her sister’s life-- uneventful, unambitious, yet full of the genuine virtues which ‘smell sweet, and blossom in the dust,’...the true success which is possible to all.”

Then Jo leans in and tends the fire which will warm her sister through the impending night.

Being Love

All this is true. Come!

You who are the Creative Word: Be.

You, so far beyond description.

- Rumi

On his witty, often visionary website, Jonathan Zap tells a story I’d like to paraphrase here.

An older woman is speaking to a college group. After she speaks, a young female student asks the older woman, “What knowledge do you have now that you didn’t have at my age?” The older woman answers,

“When I was your age I was desperately trying to be loved. Now I know that it’s better to be love.”

What does it mean to be love? And if this is an authentic goal, how do we go about practicing it in our lives?

The answer: relationship.

We can only truly fulfill our capacity to be love, in relationship to others. To mother, father, sister, brother, friend, lover, husband, child, neighbor, student, teacher, client... Relationship is the breeding ground for love in all its myriad nuances. When we cut ourselves off from authentic relationship, we can certainly feel love, think about love, decipher its intellectual presence, but we cannot be love. For love arises upon completion of relatable being.

And what about solitude and meditation, which we know to be useful tools toward a fulfilling life? Meditation and contemplation are simply ways of peeling away world to reach the stillness, the so-called Nothing, that makes the existence of Love possible.

Can't one be love in relationship to self? (i.e. hermeticism) One can foster the unique element of love within oneself, but the act of being love-- that requires explicit sharing; requires the CHOICE of relating to (dealing with!) other people, and the paradoxes of living amidst a unity that appears unmeasurably diverse. Relationship puts our capacity to love to the test. Relationship creates love, by allowing us to be love in the eternal space between You and I.