Love is Not a Four-Letter Word

Unfortunately love is a word used too liberally to label almost any relative emotion. I love him, expresses the feeling between two romantically involved people. Yet the same word describes the affection for family, friends, pets; or appreciation for a new sweater, a favored pair of shoes, even the weather.

We also say Love to describe the Supreme Source of Life.

Language shapes our perception of reality. I think we take the power of language for granted. We should be more conscious of what we say, and to do that we must be more aware of what we mean.

Interestingly, in Spanish, Te quiero means "I love you", but the verb querer means both -to want, and -to feel affection for. I find the dual association to be more honest, in an ironic way. Often when we say I love you, what we really mean is, I want you, I want to possess you.

I take issue when a friend claims the impetus for her writing is love, when we both know she is referring to countless romantic entanglements that are more often emanations of obsession, desire, jealousy, and intrigue. We have all misused the word, love.

I propose using another word for that kind of passionate addiction that we misname as love: eros. (Erotic love or desire.) This way we will need to be honest from the moment we communicate it in words; and maybe we will be less likely to delude ourselves, or others. She and I are in eros. Then when it is truly love it can be called love, with all the trust and mutual respect to which such a title alludes.

Then, also, we can be assured we honor Love as the Divine Mystery that is all. And we can love our mother and son of course, which is accurate (in most cases). And we can adore a new sweater or those old broken-in pair of sneakers.